I received a black belt, in taekwondo, at the age of 17 after over 3 1/2 years of training, yet, I still had no confidence in my ability to defend myself, much less fight. I had some techniques and skill sets that gave me an advantage a few years later at the age of 20 when I joined the Marines and we practiced LINE training and had boxing matches. Yet, I still had little confidence in my ability to protect myself. I became a green belt Marine Corps Martial Arts Instructor at 26 years old. A three week school, I began getting the first feelings of true confidence due to the rigorous training that went into learning how to fight. At 29 years old I was introduced to Brazilian Jiujitsu (BJJ). Within a few months I had far more confidence in myself than ever before up to that point. Years later again now at the age of 33 I have earned my brown belt in the Marine Corps Martial Arts Program (MCMAP). I have more confidence in myself now than ever before.
As I look back I wonder to ymself what the difference has been in my level of confidence? Was it the black belt in taekwondo? Clearly not. Blue belts in BJJ and judo? The brown belt in MCMAP? I don't think that the belts have much, if anything, to do with any of it. As I look back it seems to come down to the realism of the training I had at different phases of my personal bushido.
As a teenager I practiced taekwondo. At that particular club sparring came with dawning lots of foam padding for protection, and practicing lots of sportive, but not realistic, techniques, with minimal power. It was like playing a game of tag for point, with penalties for hitting too hard or to the wrong places. No direct punches to the face or head; minimal force when kicking to the head and torso...no techniques whatsoever to the limbs, back, or throat. What I ended up learning was how to play tag, bottom line.
Later in college at a different club the kicks and punches came much faster and harder, but still the rules of the game applied. It was all sport oriented with close to zero emphasis on self-defense. In the Marines, however, life was quite the opposite. In LINE training the emphasis was on killing the enemy through a repetitive, predetermined sequence of techniques. It was decent training, but still, not very realistic. Either way, I still couldn't intelligently defend myself if attacked. Even with taekwondo competition when the adrenaline rush can happen, it only addresses a standing, striking phase of combat. There isn't even the threat of being swept off your feet.
The real changes started occurring when I began MCMAP training at the Martial Arts Instructor course at Camp Lejeune, NC. Most of the course was devoted to learning techniques, for certain, but the environment was quite different. Like LINE training, everything was outdoors. What you get from that is that you are wearing clothes, complete with boots. In most dojo's, bear feet and a gi is all you've got, plus a matted floor. Wearing boots on a hard ground is an entirely different experience. Unlike LINE training, we are expected to put techniques together as they supported the situation, not just mimic predetermined patterns of techniques. Solidifying this change was my introduction to BJJ where there was more of the same. The emphasis on body mechanics, simplicity, and live training predominates BJJ. One can know all the techniques in the world, but if they cannot be applied against an unwilling opponent then they are all completely useless.
I competed in grappling and judo tournaments several times.....there's nothing like the adrenaline rush that comes with fighting someone that you don't know in a stadium full of onlookers. Learning to control that adrenaline rush is very realistic, despite the rules of the game. Being thrown is real. Being choked is real. Being knocked out is real. The only thing not real are the rules of the game and the mats beneath you. Even with that, it only addresses one phase of combat. You can't kick or punch. In judo there are time limits for the ground phase of combat. In both you can be pinned with no worries about being punched in the face, or kicked while lying on the ground.
Continuing my training in MCMAP and BJJ over a few years brought my to the MAI Brown Belt course: two weeks in and out of a cage in Kansas City, MO in the winter. In the first week we reviewed and learned techniques. The second week was devoted almost entirely to practical application, read: fighting. We boxed, we grappled, we fought with practice knives with no holds barred. We fought with sticks outdoors and indoors...on the move and with stationary dynamic opponents. We fought individually and in two-man teams. We fought rested and we fought tired and sore. The bottom line was that we fought. Punching, kicking, elbows, knees and even head butting and grappling....every phase of combat utilizing nearly every weapon of the human body. Of course we wore protective equipment, but the bottom line was in the actually fighting.
Even though I've got years of martial arts experience, I've never felt more confident than after just those two weeks of training. I was able to have practical application of my taekwondo punches and kicks as well as my BJJ and judo throws and grappling techniques against someone else that was not playing a game or sport, was larger and stronger, and in most cases more athletic. To win against that kind of an opponent was a huge confidence builder.
In training there is always the balance between realistic training and in safety. I also ended up with some minor joint injuries and lots of soreness. But eventually those injuries will heal. The confidence in your techniques will last far longer.
As I look back I wonder to ymself what the difference has been in my level of confidence? Was it the black belt in taekwondo? Clearly not. Blue belts in BJJ and judo? The brown belt in MCMAP? I don't think that the belts have much, if anything, to do with any of it. As I look back it seems to come down to the realism of the training I had at different phases of my personal bushido.
As a teenager I practiced taekwondo. At that particular club sparring came with dawning lots of foam padding for protection, and practicing lots of sportive, but not realistic, techniques, with minimal power. It was like playing a game of tag for point, with penalties for hitting too hard or to the wrong places. No direct punches to the face or head; minimal force when kicking to the head and torso...no techniques whatsoever to the limbs, back, or throat. What I ended up learning was how to play tag, bottom line.
Later in college at a different club the kicks and punches came much faster and harder, but still the rules of the game applied. It was all sport oriented with close to zero emphasis on self-defense. In the Marines, however, life was quite the opposite. In LINE training the emphasis was on killing the enemy through a repetitive, predetermined sequence of techniques. It was decent training, but still, not very realistic. Either way, I still couldn't intelligently defend myself if attacked. Even with taekwondo competition when the adrenaline rush can happen, it only addresses a standing, striking phase of combat. There isn't even the threat of being swept off your feet.
The real changes started occurring when I began MCMAP training at the Martial Arts Instructor course at Camp Lejeune, NC. Most of the course was devoted to learning techniques, for certain, but the environment was quite different. Like LINE training, everything was outdoors. What you get from that is that you are wearing clothes, complete with boots. In most dojo's, bear feet and a gi is all you've got, plus a matted floor. Wearing boots on a hard ground is an entirely different experience. Unlike LINE training, we are expected to put techniques together as they supported the situation, not just mimic predetermined patterns of techniques. Solidifying this change was my introduction to BJJ where there was more of the same. The emphasis on body mechanics, simplicity, and live training predominates BJJ. One can know all the techniques in the world, but if they cannot be applied against an unwilling opponent then they are all completely useless.
I competed in grappling and judo tournaments several times.....there's nothing like the adrenaline rush that comes with fighting someone that you don't know in a stadium full of onlookers. Learning to control that adrenaline rush is very realistic, despite the rules of the game. Being thrown is real. Being choked is real. Being knocked out is real. The only thing not real are the rules of the game and the mats beneath you. Even with that, it only addresses one phase of combat. You can't kick or punch. In judo there are time limits for the ground phase of combat. In both you can be pinned with no worries about being punched in the face, or kicked while lying on the ground.
Continuing my training in MCMAP and BJJ over a few years brought my to the MAI Brown Belt course: two weeks in and out of a cage in Kansas City, MO in the winter. In the first week we reviewed and learned techniques. The second week was devoted almost entirely to practical application, read: fighting. We boxed, we grappled, we fought with practice knives with no holds barred. We fought with sticks outdoors and indoors...on the move and with stationary dynamic opponents. We fought individually and in two-man teams. We fought rested and we fought tired and sore. The bottom line was that we fought. Punching, kicking, elbows, knees and even head butting and grappling....every phase of combat utilizing nearly every weapon of the human body. Of course we wore protective equipment, but the bottom line was in the actually fighting.
Even though I've got years of martial arts experience, I've never felt more confident than after just those two weeks of training. I was able to have practical application of my taekwondo punches and kicks as well as my BJJ and judo throws and grappling techniques against someone else that was not playing a game or sport, was larger and stronger, and in most cases more athletic. To win against that kind of an opponent was a huge confidence builder.
In training there is always the balance between realistic training and in safety. I also ended up with some minor joint injuries and lots of soreness. But eventually those injuries will heal. The confidence in your techniques will last far longer.
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